MyOutSpirit.com Gay Spirituality Blog

Gay artist explores Jesus and marriage

Jesus supported love, but not marriage, according to a thought-provoking new poster by gay artist Dirk Vanden.
 
Large white words against a rainbow background state, “FYI: Jesus never married, nor commanded nor advocated nor performed ‘marriage.’”  At the bottom is a Biblical quote from Jesus, “Love one another as I have loved you.”

Vanden says that he creates artworks such as “Jesus Never Married” to help gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender (GLBT) people who are “seeking equality, legitimacy, legality -- acceptance -- of ourselves and our unions and families.”

The poster is a welcome contribution to the current debate about same-sex marriage.  Conservatives often use Christianity to justify denying lesbian and gay couples the right to marry.  However, Jesus Christ himself was apparently not a big supporter of marriage.

Read the whole story at the Jesus in Love Blog on GLBT spirituality and the arts.

Image credit:  “Jesus Never Married” by Dirk Vanden

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Submitted by Kittredge Cherry, author of Art That Dares: Gay Jesus, Woman Christ, and More

Troy Perry on CA Ruling

Today, I am adding my voice to the voices of people of goodwill everywhere who are deeply disappointed that the California Supreme Court has failed to uphold marriage equality for California's citizens.

It is ironic that the same court that ruled in favor of marriage equality last year has now denied that same right in today's ruling.

My forty years of work on behalf of human rights and social justice offer hope that today's ruling, while a setback for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender couples, is only a temporary setback in the quest for full equality under the law for all of our citizens.

The silver lining in the court's ruling is that the 18,000 same-sex couples who were legally married before the adoption of Proposition 8 will continue to have full marriage equality under the law.

I am joining hands with civic, political and faith leaders to redouble our efforts to guarantee marriage equality for all of our state's citizens and to pursue every possible option to achieve that goal at the earliest possible date.

~ Rev. Elder Troy Perry founded the Metropolitan Community Church.

A Dose of Inspiration

I meet with local pastors in the North East part of Indiana weekly. I build relationships with them and urge them to create safe places for LGBT people in their churches and to be extremely sensitive when they preach on homosexuality. After doing so many of these meetings and constantly being told that God wants to change me it becomes easy to lose hope. Hope that the work I am doing, that we are all doing, is changing anything. I've been feeling like this a lot lately. I came across this song though that gave me some inspiration and hope. I want to share that song with you today and hope it gives you the same hope and inspiration it gave me. Here is what the artist Rascal Flatts who perform this song have to say about it...

Gary LeVox from the band says, "We actually have some gay people that work with us, and we have a lot of friends that are gay, too, and I know that this song has inspired them. I know that coming out was tough on their parents and on them and the whole entire family. For a long time, some of them didn’t get to hear ‘I love you’ from their dads or be accepted in that way. It’s helped a lot of our friends."

Follow the link for this inspiring song...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAMGsJ38_cg&feature=player_embedded

Spread love,

Azariah Southworth

Music video supports same-sex marriage

"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.

A touching video supports same-sex marriage -- at a time when group divorce is threatened for 18,000 same-sex marriages in California.  I was moved by seeing images of real gay and lesbian couples set to the song “Fidelity” by Regina Spektor.

Courage Campaign made the music video to inspire people to sign a petition to the California Supreme Court to protect same-sex marriage.  Petition deadline: Valentine’s Day!

News broke Tuesday (Feb. 3) that the state Supreme Court will hear oral arguments on March 5, then decide within 90 days about the validity of Prop 8 and the 18,000 marriages.

Ken Starr -- yes, the prosecutor who led the campaign to impeach President Bill Clinton -- filed a legal brief for the "Yes on 8" campaign. It would forcibly divorce the 18,000 same-sex couples married in California last year before the passage of Prop 8.

When Starr's legal brief went public in December, the Courage Campaign immediately launched the "Don't Divorce..." campaign, asking members to send pictures with a simple message. 

See those beautiful, powerful photos on the music video, and consider signing the petition at CourageCampaign.org.

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Cross-posted at the Jesus in Love Blog

When is Incest Not Incest?

[The following commentary continues our ongoing conversation on "Reconsidering Marriage."  Read Clayton's first two editorials "Reconsidering Marriage" and "Rick Warren Comes Out for Gay Rights," and additional commentary by our bloggers Azariah Southworth ("Show Rick Some Love") and Joe Perez ("What, was Jeremiah Wright busy?").]

The LGBT community is mistaken about the fight for marriage equality.  Many of us equate the battle for equal partnership rights with the war for equal respect and recognition of our relationships, and the two goals are not the same.

If Rev. Rick Warren - arguably the most influential Protestant minister in the world - is willing to come out in public and say we should have equal partnership rights, we have won a significant battle.  The fact that he does not afford our relationships with equal respect and recognition in his church is not what we are trying to change here, but that is the real reason why we have attacked him since: "He compared our love to incest and pedophilia! He won't let gays join his church!"

We all have different paradigms through which we interpret the world; that is why Gandhi said, "There are as many religions as there are people."  So what is Warren's paradigm that explains how he can say at the same time that he supports gay equal partnership rights and also declare that to him gay marriage is the same as "having a brother and sister together and call that marriage" or "one guy having multiple wives and calling that marriage?" 

If we look at the world through Warren's eyes, here's what I think we see:

Slightly more than 50 percent of households are headed by unmarried people, some single and some partnered, and almost a third of children in the United States are being raised in unmarried homes. About 40 percent of unmarried partner households, queer and heterosexual, have children under 18 years of age living in them. Many aging baby-boomers will spend a significant part of their senior years alone. Many will live with relatives or friends in non-conjugal relationships. Increasingly, both married and unmarried adults are serving as primary caregivers for aging and infirm parents or other relatives. Many people live in extended-family households. Needless to say, LGBT people in each of these categories often face the added burdens of homophobia and transphobia.

Requiring marriage as a way to access legal recognition and the economic support of a caring society is not a viable option for millions of households. Consider, for example, these kinds of families: senior citizens living together or serving as one another's caregivers, partners, or constructed families; close friends or siblings who live together in long-term, committed, non-conjugal relationships, serving as each other's primary support; extended families living under one roof (a practice common in many immigrant communities). [1]

Same-sex couples and these other diverse, non-traditional partnerships would benefit greatly from the rights and responsibilities currently only associated with heterosexual, conjugal marriage, but, while Rick Warren recognizes that these families would benefit from equal partnership rights, he rejects that those partnerships be called "Marriage."

This means that in Warren's paradigm, "having a brother and sister together and calling that marriage" doesn't necessarily mean incest. This is why he declared that he has never equated same-sex couples with incest or pedophilia - it wasn't what he meant.

The LGBT community should see beyond our own narrow issues and build a broad coalition, including Warren, to call for a broader definition of family so that marriage, for all who choose it, is only one option among many, not the only way people can access essential government protections and supports like unmarried partner access to health insurance, second-parent adoption, and survivor benefits for Social Security and pensions.

We should take this rare opportunity to fight for legislation to provide access to a flexible set of household benefits and options that are separated from the requirement of conjugal or marital relationship.

What form does victory take?  On December 30, Ali Shams and Kaelan Housewright, two straight California students, introduced a ballot measure to eliminate marriage from State legislation, guaranteeing everyone equal Domestic Partnership rights and voiding Prop 8.  If we can relinquish the word "marriage" to non-governmental (i.e. sacred) recognition, we have the chance to help millions of households by pursuing civil unions for all.  LGBT people will no longer be seen primarily as a self-interested constituency, but as partners in a larger, multiracial struggle for social and economic justice for all.

I believe we will eventually win the war for equal respect and recognition of our relationships, but let's go ahead and win the fight for equal partnership rights in the meantime.

Love,
Clayton

[1] This article includes quotes and statistics from KAY WHITLOCK's "The Perfect Storm: Why Progressives Must Reframe the Narrow Terms of Marriage Politics," PEACEWORK MAGAZINE, April 2007.

RICK WARREN COMES OUT FOR GAY RIGHTS

This SHOULD have been the headline around the world after the Rev. Rick Warren, Pastor of Saddleback Church and author of The Purpose Driven Life, gave this significant interview to Beliefnet.

Unfortunately, a misunderstanding of Warren’s comments has been widely and loudly disseminated by my fellow progressives, describing Warren as bigoted and hateful, when, in fact, his comments reflect an unusual depth of understanding about gay marriage as a civil rights issue.

Warren may be, as The Task Force warns, an outspoken opponent of reproductive choice and stem-cell research, and that should concern us, but he has never equated marriage between same-sex couples with incest and pedophilia.

In this video, posted on the Saddleback website on December 22, the Sunday before Christmas,  Warren says, flat-out, "I believe no such thing. I never have."  In the video, Warren explains again that he has always firmly believed that gay couples – and other non-traditional families – should have equal access to the rights and responsibilities of marriage.  He just doesn’t think it should be called “Marriage.”

Does this necessarily mean he is ready to give up his legal marriage and go to the wall for civil unions for everyone, as MyOutSpirit.com wondered in “Reconsidering Marriage: Are Gay Activists Fighting the Right Fight?”

Probably not. 

At the same time, framing this passionate and unrelentingly civil Christian leader as a hateful bigot in the style of Jerry Falwell is unacceptable and counter-productive.

I take that back.  Attacking Warren is only counter-productive if you value dignified and thoughtful coalition-building for the long-term success of our movement for the equal rights and recognition of LGBT families.

If your priority is increasing year-end fundraising, riling up your base, or keeping your issues in the news, then attacking Warren makes perfect sense.

We should be better than that, especially as spiritual LGBT people.  We should educate our community to have deep perspicacity about our issues, and to have the maturity to do the long-term work of creating change.

LGBT activists from around the country will convene in Denver, CO, at the end of January to train and network and get inspired at The Task Force’s Creating Change conference, and I hope the messages that emerge will reflect the world as it is, and not the twisted sound-bites and caricatures that too often define the discussion, as in the case of Rick Warren.

Let's resolve to do better in 2009.

Love,

Clayton

P.S. Of course, these are MY views and do not neccessarily reflect the views of MyOutSpirit.com or its 1,000+ members and resources.

Reconsidering Marriage: What's Our Highest Vision?

In a December 2008 interview with Beliefnet, even "America's Pastor," Rick Warren, agrees that same-sex couples should have the same legal rights and responsibilities as heterosexual couples, but, as we have heard time and time again from opponents of equality, his primary issue is with the redefinition of the WORD "marriage."

Warren tells Beliefnet, "I’m opposed to redefinition of a 5,000 year definition of marriage. I’m opposed to having a brother and sister being together and calling that marriage. I’m opposed to an older guy marrying a child and calling that marriage. I’m opposed to one guy having multiple wives and calling that marriage."

All this trouble over a word?  What are we really fighting for, here?  Maybe what BOTH sides really need is a compromise that transforms our ideas about civil unions. 

In the following 2007 article, KAY WHITLOCK explains the "Beyond Marriage" movement (www.beyondmarriage.org) and why we need a new strategic LGBT vision that does not prioritize marriage over other family forms:

"We must also call for a broader definition of family so that marriage, for all who choose it, is only one option among many, not the only way people can access essential government protections and supports. These supports include unmarried partner access to health insurance, second-parent adoption, and survivor benefits for Social Security and pensions."

Surprisingly, it sounds like Rick Warren and others would already be on board.

Read "The Perfect Storm: Why Progressives Must Reframe the Narrow Terms of Marriage Politics" by Kay Whitlock

Marianne Williamson on Gay Marriage

LGBT Ally, best-selling author, A Course in Miracles teacher, and regular on Oprah & Friends, Marianne Williamson, posted this journal after Proposition 8 passed in California on Nov. 4:

Several years ago, I was asked to appear on Larry King to discuss the legalization of gay marriage. I don't know why they chose me exactly, except that I was a straight person who would vote PRO. In any case, I spoke to a gay friend of mine before going on the program, and he gave me the strongest argument I had heard yet for why gay people should be allowed to be married:

"All these years, they've harped on us because we don't live a 'traditional' lifestyle," he said. "Now we want to do the most traditional thing in the world, and they won't let us!" That sealed the deal for me.

A few years later, I was having lunch with a friend of mine who had mentioned that she opposed the right of gays to marry. She is the widow of a famous mayor in a large American city. She had worked years in an effort, ultimately successful, to have the city's airport renamed in her husband's honor.

"My last ditch appeal, the one that finally put us over the top," she said, "was when I asked a bunch of women in the city, 'Would it really affect your life one way or the other, whether or not the airport was renamed after my husband?'" These women's realization that in fact it would not is what caused a tipping point in favor of the city's willingness to rename the airport.

I looked at her when she told me that story, and said, "Well, isn't it the same thing with gay marriage? If a gay or lesbian couple get married, will that really affect your life one bit?"

continue reading on Marianne's blog

Learn more about Marianne Williamson's work .

Thanksgiving: A time to thank straight allies

The following Thanksgiving thoughts are taken from a lesbian’s thank-you letter to her neighborhood association in California after the election.

“Thank you to all our straight neighbors, allies and friends who put up yard signs, made phone calls and supported the huge lesbian and gay civil rights movement to make marriage for our people legal in the State of California.  I loved those NO ON 8 SIGNS!!
 
“…I remember the days when there were no straight people at any of our events, and certainly for decades straight people wanted nothing to do with us.  Now something amazing has changed, and I feel proud of our little neighborhood where people literally put signs in the yards that I felt personally supported me.  I smile every time I drive by all your houses now because I remember where all the signs were.”

Read the whole letter at the Jesus in Love Blog

Stop the H8 protests support glbt marriage

Thousands of people rallied for same-sex marriage in simultaneous protests held in every state today.

I was among the more than 500 protesters at the City Hall in Pasadena, California, who rallied to stop the hate behind Proposition 8, the law that just passed banning same-sex marriage.

There was a strong sense of unity, love, hope and creativity. I recorded the historic day with photos and videos. I’m posting a few here, with more great photos and videos at the Jesus in Love Blog. These are too good to miss, so I hope that you will visit the Jesus in Love Blog to see it all.

Join the Impact has more info on the protests and the movement to promote love and equality.

 

"Support Love! Stop H8"  That says it all.

I love the rainbow signs held by these three black women: “I won’t until you can.”  “Separate is not equal” and Love is for all.”

 

“Mormons want 3 wives -- but I can’t have 1 husband!  Get a grip!”  Clever jab at the Mormon Church, which funded much of the latest campaign to ban same-sex marriage.