
{By Lance Westendarp, YogaForTransformation.com}
Why is it that we put so much pressure on ourselves to know exactly what we want at any given point in time? Naturally, there are instances when it’s important to identify a direction in which we would like to move, but the trouble is in getting so attached to that direction that we resist the inevitability of change. I think the key is to be able to establish goals and identify what we want when necessary, but to also learn to embrace the fluidity of life and become less rigid with ourselves. Life can be a lot less stressful than we tend to make it. I look back through the years that I’ve been in existence, and reflect about how many times I’ve changed directions.
And now, storytime! My own career path began with a major interest in music, which led me to music school where I studied performance. From the moment I stepped foot onto campus, I concluded that being a professional musician would be my life’s work. When I developed tendonitis during my studies, I had to really step back from music, and examine the driving force that pushed me towards my goal to the detriment of my own body. I had already been practicing yoga for a while, and my recently deeper exploration of spirituality as it related to my music, life, and ego led me to ask myself what the point of my rigidity was. Music was a part of my life from an early age, and I felt so strongly identified with a career in music that I was terrified of imagining my life without it. I had convinced myself that if I lost that, I would greatly diminish my own self worth. I’ve had moments of identity crisis like that with other things in my life as well, including my own body image. The reality is that I would be no more or less a person if I didn’t end up as a professional musician, or have the perfect body, and neither would anyone else. But that devious little ego in us all would have us see it differently. The miraculous part of this story is that as soon as I let go of my need to hold onto this lifelong goal of being a concert pianist, my body let go of the pain and my tendonitis began to heal after 5 years of sweat and tears. Since then, I have a renewed and far greater passion for music, yoga, understanding what my body needs, and life in itself, and I owe that to learning the beautiful, but very difficult lesson above.
So what’s the point of all of this? I didn’t find this renewed passion for life by searching for it relentlessly. That doesn’t mean that you won’t either, but rather that you should question the source of your inner drive to know your future from time to time, because it won’t always serve you spiritually, emotionally, or even physically if it’s ego driven. If you constantly need to know what your passion or purpose is, how open will you be to change when it eventually arrives in some form or another. For all you know, that change, as difficult or unexpected as it may be, will be the key to moving forward through your obstacles or discovering a passion for life you never knew existed.
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